Craving Balance? The Sunday Serenity Revolution Starts Here!
I don't feel worthy of asking Allah for more.
“Do you feel a lack of balance in your life? Do you yearn to find it but don't know where to begin? I hear you, as I have experienced the same struggle. That's why I created "Sunday Serenity.”
What is "Sunday Serenity" ?
It's a heartfelt weekly newsletter from me, Nour, to you. The purpose of this newsletter is to provide you with a much-needed moment of self-care. By finding balance in your day, you will ultimately achieve greater balance in your week and transform your life, InshaAllah.
What to Expect:
Each month we will explore one theme from different angles. The theme until the end of February is balance. The format for each newsletter includes:
Debunking Negative Beliefs:
We'll tackle one common negative belief together.
Practical Tips from the Deen:
Two actionable tips from Islamic teachings to strengthen your spiritual heart muscle.
Coaching Questions:
Three coaching questions to help you navigate and find answers within yourself.
The framework of this newsletter aims to deepen your self-awareness, enhance your relationships with others, and ultimately draw you closer to Allah, InshaAllah.
Exciting Updates:
I retired from coaching! Why the change, you ask? Well, my dear friend, it hit me that so many people out there lack access to coaching. Allah has blessed me with the gift of captivating people with my words. Writing has always been my childhood dream, but self-doubt and comparison held me back.
I kept dreaming of being a writer without taking any action. But everything changed this past Ramadan when I stumbled upon Aliyah Umm Raiyann's book, Ramadan Reflections. It transformed my career path and ignited a fire within me. During the last 10 nights of Ramadan, I fervently made dua for my life long dream to become a writer.
And now, I'm thrilled to announce that I'm currently writing a book entitled "Becoming a Tranquil Soul: Lessons for a Distracted Heart." I'm writing it with YOU in mind! Stay tuned for more updates and teasers about the book.
Closing down my coaching business and fully devoting myself to writing this book is an answered dua. I asked Allah for support, and He sent it to me in the form of the Muslim Writer's Salon. Joining this community of writers has fulfilled my long-held desire. The support I've received has been nothing short of incredible, and I truly believe that Allah sent them to help make this book a reality.
Ok, now let's focus on bringing more balance and serenity into your life.
One common negative belief I hear from women I've coached is this:
"I don't feel worthy of asking Allah for more."
This mindset often limits us and leads to unintentional negative thoughts about Allah. Did you ever think of it that way? I know it may surprise you, but let's dig deeper into this.
When we say, "I don't feel worthy of asking Allah for more," we're implying that we determine our worth. But the truth is, Allah is the one who determines the worth of a believer. And guess what? Our Prophet (peace be and blessings be upon him) has encouraged us to ask for more!
Building a strong relationship with Allah starts with understanding who He is and who we are, and recognizing our role. Our role is to ask our Lord. Allah loves it when we ask Him. He is generous in granting our requests. Even if we've been making the same dua for years, know that it's a beloved act of worship.
Sometimes, we may feel discouraged because we've been asking for a long time. I've experienced this myself recently. There are several duas I've been making for years, and at times, it became difficult to keep making them. I no longer felt the same passion I once had, and that worried me.
So, I turned to Allah and made dua, seeking understanding and guidance, to reconnect with my dua emotionally. And you know what happened next? It was nothing short of a miracle!
Allah Guides You to What You Need
Let me share a heartfelt story with you. It's about my mother, who passed away some time ago. Until shortly before her death, she expressed disbelief in Allah. But in her final moments, something remarkable happened.
She turned back to Allah, even though she passed away as a non-Muslim. Never having knowing much about Islam. I harboured a lingering question: "Was it enough?" I couldn't help but wonder. Yet, I pushed this question aside, knowing that the answer lies in the realm of the unseen and is known only to Allah.
But a few days ago, something extraordinary happened. I stumbled upon a journal belonging to my mother in the storage area of our building. I had seen it many times before but never read its contents. However, this time, I felt compelled to open it.
What I discovered inside were pages and pages of heartfelt dua written to Allah, spanning two months of her life. As I read her words, I couldn't help but feel the depth of her faith and certainty. It was as if she had an intimate connection with Allah despite not being a Muslim and seemingly having no exposure to Islam.
In one entry, she wrote:
"Help me, make myself strong, and do all the things I am supposed to do. Help me, Lord of all people. Give me strength, give me power to get things together. Help me, Lord."
These words struck a chord in my heart and brought me to tears. My mother conversed with Allah in such an intimate and vulnerable manner, with unwavering faith that He would assist her. Although she may not have received what she asked for in this life, there is hope for the next, inShaaAllah.
This discovery provided me with unexpected closure. I hadn't even asked for it, yet my Lord knew how much my heart needed it. It made me realize that to truly be vulnerable in front of Allah, we must surrender ourselves completely to Him.
And that's why "surrender" is my word for this year. By surrendering to Allah, I have found the reconnection with dua. Part of surrendering is knowing that the Qadr of Allah (predestination), what He has chosen for me, is the best, albeit not the easiest, yet it is still without doubt the best.
Let us strive to trust in Allah's wisdom and have faith in His plans for us. Allah's boundless mercy and generosity allows us to seek His Divine Help. May we find solace in turning to Him wholeheartedly, knowing that He is the ultimate source of comfort, guidance, and fulfillment.
There is a beautiful gem from the Arabic language, derived from the root word "sin, laam, meem."
The word "أَسلَمَ" ("aslama") means to become a Muslim or to surrender. Interestingly, the word for "to be safe" is also derived from the same root word, "سَلِمَ" ("salima"). So, surrendering to Allah is not only becoming a Muslim, but it also brings us safety, because we belong to the Lord of the Worlds.
Let's put this knowledge into practice with the first practical tip from our deen (faith):
Allah encourages us to know Him. In the Quran, Allah says,
"He is the One Who created you from dust, then from a sperm-drop, then [developed you into] a clinging clot, then He brings you forth as infants, so that you may reach your prime, and become old—though some of you may die sooner—reaching an appointed time, so perhaps you may understand [Allah's power]." (Quran 40:67, the Clear Quran translation by Dr. Mustafa Khattab)
Knowing who you are asking makes asking easier. When you feel resistance to asking, turn to the One who can help you, just like my did mother and so many others before her. Remember, Allah has power over all things.
May our hearts be filled with hope, trust, and the courage to seek Allah's help in every aspect of our lives, ameen.
As you go through your week, keep this beautiful ayah in mind.
Take action and make it your screensaver for the week. Every time you face a challenge, remember the power of Allah and recite this ayah. Let it serve as a constant reminder each time you unlock your phone or see it on your laptop screen. May it always remind you of Allah and His infinite strength, ameen.
Here's the second practical tip from our deen:
Anas ibn Malik reported that the Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, "Let one of you ask his Lord for his needs, all of them, even for a shoestring when his breaks." This hadith teaches us the importance of asking Allah for everything.
This week, put this teaching into practice. Ask Allah for even the smallest things, knowing that He is the One who created you from dust, then from a sperm-drop, and developed you into a clinging clot. If you're already in the habit of making dua for little things, make even more dua.
And if you're not accustomed to making dua for the small things, start with something simple. Ask Allah for guidance in the supermarket, or when deciding what to wear, seek His pleasure. Remember, Allah never grows tired of hearing from you.
Now, let's reflect on three coaching questions related to our original negative belief of not feeling worthy of making dua for more:
By limiting yourself in front of Allah, what are you missing out on?
Take a moment to write out a list, and then answer the following two coaching questions:
What small action can you take now to move closer to Allah?
What have you not been asking Allah for?
I know that asking these questions can be scary and uncomfortable. Remember Allah is with you, and I am here too, InShaaAllah.
Take a moment right now to reflect on one small thing you haven't been asking Allah for. Craft a heartfelt dua and share it with us by hitting the 'reply' button or leaving a comment. Your voice matters, and your experiences can inspire others on the path to serenity. Remember, it's the small steps that lead to significant change. May Allah bless our efforts and grant us the strength to surrender to His wisdom. Ameen
Much Love ,
Nour Cauveren
Ameen to your beautiful duas and reflection
Nour I am so happy to see your words gracing this site mashallah!! Mabrouk on taking the leap!
And I love the prompt you set...I have definitely limited what I've asked for and realise how ridiculous that is. So many human ailments come from this simple fact of not valuing ourselves enough. And perhaps fear of what we might turn into if we do.